if a child ....

Something to share =)

If a child lives with critism, he learns to condemn
If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight
If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy
If a child lives with shame, he learns to feel guilty.

If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient.
If a child lives with encouragement, he learns confidence
If a child lives with praise, he learns to appreciate
If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice.

If a child lives with security, he learns to have faith
If a child lives with approval, he learns to like himself
If a child lives with acceptance & friendship, he learns to find love in the world

~~ Dororthy Nolte ~~

If I had my child to raise all over again,
I'd finger-paint more, and poin the finger less.
I would do less corrrecting and make more connecting.
I'd take my eyes of my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I would care to know less and know to care more
I'd take more hikes &fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.

I'd do more huggung and less tugging
I'd build self esteem first, and the house later.
I would be firm less often, and affirm much more
I'd teach less about the love of power,
and more about the power of love.

~~ Diane Loomans~~

one frenzy shopper at KL International Book Fair 2010 PWTC

Visitors at the KL International Book Fair 2010 at PWTC must have caught a glimpse of a crazy shopper these 2 days (yesterday & today).

She has been walking around lugging bags & bags of books with her ... with her dishelved hair. She's walking around scanning for best deals.

I managed to get hold of her and got a 1st hand info on her purchases ...

imagine she managed to grab these amount of books over a span of 2 days ... 2nd day with the help of a colleague (thanks Yong!)

plastic bag 1 : 24 x RM1 each storybook (including Lady Bird series and other hardcover series)

Total bag 1: RM24

plastic bag 2 : 1 pack of 'colour me with science' & 'I love science' series books - RM10 per pack of 10 books.

total bag 2 : RM10 x 2 = RM20

Plastic bag 3 : from left, the 4 chemistry, bio, physic & science illustrated = RM6.

What to expect series = RM24.90 x 2 =RM49.80. (actual price about RM50 per book)

Element of Education Success, Picking cherries from stock market, The burning desire in life & Chinese Festivals cost RM2 each = RM2 x 4 = RM8

the english & science preschool workbook cost RM0.50 each = RM0.50 x 5 = RM2.50

the remaining 3 books next to what to expect = RM10 + RM8 + free = RM18

plastic bag 4 : flash cards. mostly is RM20 for 3 boxes. So altogether about RM90

plastic bag 5 : past issues of 'Pa & Ma' .... a magazine I grow to like & has been waiting for chance to buy past issues. RM4.50 x 10 = RM45

So her total spending = RM24 + RM20 + RM49.80 + RM8 + RM2.50 + RM18 + RM90 + RM45 = RM257.30

But she seem to be beaming with happy smile ... she says she has no regret.

In fact she has got herself very great deals ... value for money ... imagine RM1 for a hardcover story book?

at the same time can use for income tax deduction too! she added

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ps. oh! remember those 'Siri tiga penyiasat' / ' Lima sekawan' / 'Siri Hadi Boys' / 'Nancy Drew' which we used to like during primary school .... they are selling these at RM0.50 per book.

I've thought of buying some for the children at orphanage but I can't carry anymore weight than I'm able to so I forego the idea .... unless any of you can offer to come along to help carry?

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doesn't mean ...

there's something I see today that I think I need to write about because I 'boh song'.

I was at the KL International Book Fair at PWTC this evening after work. Can get some very good deals (but that's beside the point).
At one of the booth, I saw a Malay lady (a mother I suppose) browsing through collection of Peter & Jane (hardcover story books like Ladybird series) ---> you know those collection with different level from level 1 - level 10.
It was written very clearly on the rack that there will be 30% discount on all Peter & Jane series and the price shown is before discount. The price tag shows RM9.90. A simple calculation will show that the book cost about RM7 each after discount.

This lady took a book, walk up to an Indian man (not sure a temporary worker/permanent worker who's neatly dressed) and tidying up books and asked him "how much is this?" in a very rude manner.
The worker didn't reply (as in speak) but point to the discount tag on the rack instead.
The lady got angry and raise her voice "you don't know is it? no use".
She then took the book and stormed to the counter & I presume to check the price with a manager (perhaps).

Seeing that I was dumbfounded by the whole episode, the worker looked at me & signalled to me that he couldn't speak.
At that point of time, I feel bad.
I just smile and nodded my head to acknowledge him.

All I want to say with this incident is :

1. I applaud this company who is not biased towards less privileged people - at least this company give them a chance to earn a living.

2. I do not agree with the lady's attitude.
Firstly, it was very clear on the discount given & that the prices shown are before discount. Secondly, even if the worker doesn't tell you verbally the price, he did attempt to show you. Thirdly, even if the worker doesn't reply to you, you have no rights to raise your voice and call another person no use (what more a less privilege person).
Forthly, you maybe a more educated person whose children read 'Peter & Jane' series but that doesn't mean you have rights to be rude, to judge people or do whatever you like to whoever you want.

Really makes me wonder what's the use of the so good 'Peter & Jane' series (no offense to Peter & Jane series) when you doesn't even able to potray a good example of basic courtesy & morale for your children.

I'm supposed to go sleep but I just have to let go of this 'boh song'ness. Now I think I can sleep better.

in support of earth hour 2010

in support of CY's earth 2010 effort, I've created a little lantern too =)
come show your support too!

doing things I've not done for quite a while

so here I am ...

listening to songs while fine tuning my resume
actually it's more like sing-along session ... having a one-(wo)man show concert eh =p
and I've got a list of my fav songs lining up (some back to 70s, 80s, 90s) ... and yes I'm that old =p

ps. finding for today : songs lyrics & melodies - once learnt very hard to forget. You will automatically know how to sing even after a few years lapse of not singing the song at all.
Music is amazing, isn't it?

and music can make us want to sleep, isn't it?
cause I'm very sleepy now....Zzzzzzz

those were the days

Today on the train (lrt) home, in a state between sleepiness & awakeness, something came to my mind.

I remember during my primary school & secondary school, how I 'ngak sek ngak sek' also can managed through.
It was still manageable during primary school ... at least if I don't know how to do homework, can still ask parents, they still able to guide on primary school stuffs.
Come secondary school ... my parents favourite line 'try asking your teacher / friends'
Come upper secondary ... my parents added another line to their favourite line 'try asking your teacher / friend. why never pay attention in class & why your friend know how to do but not you.'

So I did what I was told ----> I asked friends (a few that are top in their subjects of expertise) but when time is limited, I remembered doing 'manual photostat' of the entire answer. In fact I've been doing it most of the time =p
There were times when I did try to understand but some things were just way beyond my understanding at that point of time. Experts are human too ... they too may be irritated when I still don't get it despite their very patient and detailed explaination.
Of course I told my parents I asked my friends and got the answer (which I really did...haha)

Then I remembered last time for projek ERT (Ekonomi Rumah Tangga), we have only got like 1 hour each week to use the limited no. of sewing machine (which also has to be shared, i think ratio is 1:3). Usually, when it's time to use, it's the end of lesson time.
The thing is, not everyone has a sewing machine at home and I happened to be one of them. In order to complete the project on a tight timeline, I had to go around friends & neighbours house to use their sewing machines.
I almost spoilt a neighbour sewing machine due to my inefficiency. Only god knows how may I've been unwelcome and troublesome.
but I guess that's how i learnt to be so 'thick faced' .... haha

actually, there's a point that I want to deliver when I begin, but when I reach here i suddenly forgot why I started writing about this in 1st place...

maybe I'm wondering how I 'ngak sek ngak sek' also can pull through secondary school till today?
maybe I'm wondering whether has our schooling system done us any good?
maybe I'm wondering about what influence our family & friends can have on us?
maybe I'm wondering whether it's the destination that matters or the journey that matters?'
there are just too many possibilities...

Do you have something during your school years that you would like to share? please do so =) and let us immerse ourselves in the joy of yesteryears =)

alot done

over the past few days, I feel accomplished ... I've done alot

1. I can multitask better at work.

2. At last I make the effort to join colleagues for lunch... after the absence for the past few months.

3. organise a small gathering of some close colleagues .... watch a very entertaining movie and had a great dinner at 'food court'.

4. found the courage to voice my opinion & concern to management.

5. bought a high chair & mattress for ah bi at warehouse sales.

6. getting advice on feeding solids from friends & colleagues.

7. drove after being a passenger for so long.

8. make a little more improvement to my portfolio

9. remove 60% of the weeds from my home garden

10. clear the stack of newspapers that have been on my dining table since beginning of this year.

11. manage to read a chinese book to ah bi and go through 4 box of flash cards with him.

12. grabbed the best deal from tesco
(a) flash cards (buy 1 box free 1 box at RM3.95 each) - we bought 8 box for RM15.80 (effectively about RM2.00 per box)
(b) Playskool stacking cups - square and round (at RM3.22 each box) - each box contain 8 cups in varying descending sizes.
(c) 10-piece rubber mat - those where you combine the square to form a mat for baby tummy time (at RM7.90 for a set of 10) - bought 2 sets.

- don't ask me how I remember all the prices in detail .... I always can remember the prices I see on promotion leaflets and in hypermarkets very well (the prices can not escape from my eyes and my mind) ... must be occupational hazards =p keke

have a good week ahead everyone!!!

our new hair stylist =)

chinese new year + valentine day is coming

but since we were a little tight on budget, we decided to go for the most affordable hair stylist in town =p

ps. never mind you have hair all over your face =p

ps. never mind you have hair dye all over your forehead =p

2 years & more to come

2/2/10
We have been in this 'partnership' for 2 years
Towards the second half of last year, we have a new 'small little boss' joining us.
I couldn't have ask for more ... I'm very thankful.

2/2/10
It was a working day and we didn't take time off to celebrate.
But I was touched by the little small gesture that requires alot of effort and 'heart'
Maybe simple but it was one of the tastiest dinner I had.
and the thing is 'I've not got anything for him' <---- this I feel very bad. Our little boss was very cooperative as he fell asleep as soon as we reached home <---- something that is rare. and NOW, my 'small little boss' is calling me again.. PS. I love you both

break up

Today, I felt gloomy & down from the moment I step into the office till the moment I leave.
This kind of feeling is like you have something invisible pulling you down, weighing down on your heart.
From today, the 2 desk next to me (my left & right) will be empty. Gone are those days when I can just turn either way & start babbling away.
They broke us up and they chuck us all in different territories ... left to fend for ourselves in unchattered water.
Who knows how battered will we be by the end of the day?
Who knows what will become of us in the future?

somethings are meant to be put together before they can flourish ... put them apart, either they don't mean anything or they will fade ... take jigsaw for example.

until this stage, there's nothing much left that can be done ...
like any time in our lives ... we just have to carry on ... move forward ... accept that this are realities in life.

To the two of you (sitting to me left & right previously in the office) ... I love you.
You both have brought special meaning to my life ... I cherish those moments we spent together. Wishing you both the best of everything in life.

heart breaking

It's heart wrenching ... heart breaking to see news on the dragon boat incident.
When I looked at the headline of The Sun newspaper today ... with it a photo of a mother (& family members) crying for her son ... I feel very very sad.
My prayers to the dearly departed & their loved ones.

hear it straight from a 'near' encounter

what's wrong with me?

I feel so darn sleepy and yet I refuse to sleep ...
what have become of me?

The past 3 weeks or so ... I've been very busy
both at work n at home.
As though 24 hours is not enough for me
So many things to do ... so little time to rest n relax.
I'm overwhelmed.

Every day after work without fail I'll be nodding my head all the way home in the LRT.
Tired ... exhausted ... both the body & mind.
too many things occupying my hours ...
I think my mind/body is working 'terrificly' even when I'm asleep.
I'm coping with new additions both in my personal & working life ...
why do we have to conform to others' expectations?
why do we have so much things we want to achieve in life?
sometimes I think I live for everyone except myself ... pathetic isn't it?
I'll remain standing ... this I know
For how long ... this I'm not sure

meanwhile, I think I better grab some sleep 1st ... whatever happen tomorrow ... tomorrow only worry ... sleep is more important now.
haha...I know I'm grumbling
cause this is what I do when I'm darn sleepy n refuse to sleep

I sit like this, U sit like that

ah dear drew this a moment ago in his attempt to show how I sit ...
this was after I denied being hunchback & insisted that he also sit the same way like me

According to the sit-fu, the picture on the left is how he sit and the right is how I sit.
such a great sit-fu !! =D muahaha...
Now I've a clear pic of how I sit with my back bent .... this explain the back ache I sometimes experience.

2009 or 2010?

Suddenly I'm at a lost ...
I've not review my 2009
I've not set my reso for 2010
everything is happening too fast ... it seem like I'm still continuing from 2009 ...
wake up ...eat ... sleep ... wake up ... eat ... sleep
i think I'm experiencing hangover effect of 2009.

Perhaps, I really need to spend a little time to myself
Sit down (or maybe stand up) and think ... think really hard
be more specific with what I want
be more understanding to myself

Nevertheless, thanks to all of you for being with me all along...the ups and the downs.

On another unrelated matter
ps. I've just witnessed non-stop lightning on the night sky - more than 5 minutes and still on-going (something I've never seen before) ... ah dear told me 2012 is coming.
Suddenly I'm afraid. I'm worried. Is it true? what if it all really end?
I've not live enough ... I've not love enough ...
I'm a 'KIASI' after all.
There are people (and animal) whom I need to love, protect and care. I can't abandon them.

i just love the colours

I ended spending RM20 buying these 6 towels (3 for RM10) .... just because I love the colours.
Yes, I'm crazy =p

'Reduced to clear"

RM15 with change ... that's all forAh Bi's christmas present =D <----- thanks to 'Tesco - Reduced to Clear". Really lucky for us to stumble upon these great deals. Thank you Santa Claus!

(1) Fisher Price Learning phone (actual price RM49.90) Got it for RM5.49. Condition good without packaging and screen a little scratched but does it matter? =D

(2) Magnetic drawing board (remember those we can keep on drawing & erasing with a swipe) (don't know actual price, estimated RM15). Packaging a little torn, functionality is still there.

(3) Learn 123 - Flash Card (actual price : RM3.99) Got it for RM1.62. Again, everything intact except a packaging torn. Hehe, I know it's not time for ah bi to learn 123 yet, but ah bi just like to see mama holding the cards to him =D

(4) Bowling set + bonus rugby ball sharpener - come in loose packaging. Got it for RM2.76.
Papa & mama can play 1st ... hehe, plus those pins can make good sounds and colourful enough to attract ah bi =D









(5) combination of 2 squeky rubber ducky soap trays, 1 froggie, 1 trampoline, 1 water PSP(where you push button-->pump air to put little rings into 2 sticks). Actual price : rubber ducky each cost RM2.90, trampoline - RM4.90, water PSP - don't know. We got it for RM2.07.











With this experience, I learnt that sometimes good things in life need not be all new or very expensive. We just need to appreciate what we've got and make do with what we can afford =D cheers!!!

Happy 'Dong Jie' everyone =D

one of the most natural & tasty 'tong yuen' .... not to mention 'colourful'

made by ku po's friend .... the aunty that stays near our home.

wondering how the colour blue, purple & orange comes about (no artificial colouring)?

blue - from 'lam fa' blue flower -well known for making kuih that eat with kaya

orange & purple - from sweet potatoes.

Happy Dong Jie everyone .... hope everyone enjoy tong yuen with your family & loved ones.

December .... the month we'll always remember =)

I had a great week....
...... started with ah dear going shopping with me at SOGO for ah bi's stuff & even brought me to Pudu for some nice chicken, char siew, siew yuk rice. Sometimes I really enjoy travelling around with dear using public transport and walking around.

...... On another day, gone to cancel my credit card, went praying at the temple - had vegetarian lunch & got to know a new friend (Mag) and shopped for half a day at KLCC (ended up spending some money). My 1st time buying toys for ah bi =D ah bi's toys are mostly handed over / given by people / made out of household items.

...... Ah bi 1st outing with us .... where else if not Tesco (did I hear someone say Tesco baby?) =p

...... my buddies are going for HK trip ... how I wished I could join them but I've greater responsibilities at home ... I'm needed now

..... had my 1st time 'kuat sa' and 'tui guat' .... painful till tears come out but feel great after. I've battered arms and back like kena abused =p

December is always one of my favourite month
time for clearing leave
time when most couple ties the knot & have a new beginning - weddings & marriage registration
time when everything seem to be in a relaxing holiday mood
time when everyone is looking forward .... with the festive atmosphere & the glimpse to a fresh new year
(this year I've many friends who are delivering December babies this month ... 5 of them ... such a happy time of the year)

and also because we always have great holidays & activities such as gathering for a group of close friends in December. This December 'tidak dikecualikan' also ... OF COURSE
We are closing this year with 'yat wok suk' steamboat =D yahoo!!!
and thanks to our understanding friends .... knowing that I may be immobile for the time being, they even offer to come to our home =D

sorry for the very disorganised post ... just feel like typing whatever I want to say ... lazy to compose ah =p

help needed

If you are :

1. shopping at Guardian (the retail pharmacy chain) &

2. is not collecting stamps to redeem 'Big Headz' soft toy

I need your help, please help me to keep the stickers and do not throw them away. (It's very precious ah)

I'm currently on a mission to redeem a free Lion 'Big Headz' for ah bi.

Total they need 40 stamps .... I have 23 so far, another 17 to go.

(1 stamp given for every RM15 spent)

Thank you very very much ah =D

BF

A few months back, BF would still mean BoyFriend to me.
Now, BF has totally got a new meaning ... Breast Feeding that is
& together with bring a new string of abbreviation

try BMI?
don't worry, it still stands for Body Mass Index
well, now Breast Milk Index seemed to mean more to me =p

Before I proceed, allow me to say thank you very much to all who have supported me throughout my breastfeeding experience especially my love ones & my group of close friends who not only supported me emotionally(by borrowing me their ears and shoulder) but also financially. I'm able to invest in a good breast pump with their help (sponsoring). Also friends & colleagues who share their knowledge, books & magazines with me in their quest to help me conquer my problems.

there are a few personal experience which I would like to share (although everyone's experience is unique to mother & baby) ... hopefully these may give you a little idea what to expect when it comes (not like me...blur blur)

1. there will be well meaning & experienced senior members of family / relatives / friends who advises you to supplement with formula milk. Their reasons range from 'afraid baby not full enough','breast milk is not thick enough to make baby full','you got no enough milk', 'your milk is too dilute'. Although they all mean well, perhaps they may not realise that every ounz of formula milk is the 'killer' of breast milk supply.

2. then there will be 'doctor' who instead of giving encouragement to breastfeed, advise a mother to supplement / give formula milk to her baby. Doctor gave a more 'doctorish' reason ... you've have no idea how much your baby has drank, he's not having enough...not full enough... which is why he's not sleeping well / colicky. (did I mentioned I try very hard to listen to this 'doctor' but failed miserably). Not all doctors are pro-breastfeed... some never even advised / mentioned about breastfeeding even after the baby is bornt. Instead the doctor's clinic are distributing free formula milk powder. It's good to know that lactation consultant is a better person to go to than doctors in general.

3. then there will also be the 'confinement lady' who naturally prefer 'formula milk' as they are able to adjust the feeding time as compared to 'breast milk' feeding time as and when demanded. This is crucial to them as they need to cook for the mother & help with household works...which is best done while baby is asleep (after feeding time is adjusted) every 2-3 hours. Pacifier is a 'must' for them which may cause nipple confusion ... creating more problems to mother who is trying to establish milk supply. Most confinement lady may not have fully breastfeed their baby thus they may think it's a norm that every baby drink formula milk ... it's really up to us to insist of breastfeeding. What I did was sharing with her all the chinese pregnancy and parenting magazines to give her understanding. I've also got to know that there's another group of confinement lady who are very pro-breastfeeding all for the wrong reason... they feed the mother with lots n lots of alcohol ... the baby will be very 'easy to care' ... sleeping most of the time even when the loud noises are unbearable.

4. then there are milk powder companies who on the surface seemed very supportive of your breastfeeding effort but turn around offering you their products (which is so good & sooo good). I've been getting phone calls from major baby formula milk brands ... they are providing very good follow ups (hopefully until you start your baby on formula milk).

5. then there are companies / employers who indirectly thwart our breastfeeding effort ... due to lack of support in term of facilities. I've known many who gave up breastfeeding upon the end of maternity leave (2 mths) due to reasons as such. It's short sighted of the organisation not to 'see' the long term benefit of breastfeeding .... children with better immune system translate into lesser leave taken by employees. Perhaps there's another reason employers are not providing ... when you need to feed formula milk, you need more money, you'll work harder to earn more money (this one I made up myself)

6. then there's myself to blame ... of course, there were things that I wished I may have done differently such as not being 'so eager to please' everyone who offered advices, not being confident enough with myself & my ability, not being insistent enough when I should be .... and the list goes on. I'm not still not good enough now but I learnt through my experience. I really do hope that my persistence 'a.k.a stubborness' was not a worthless effort.

the journey is really not easy and may not be getting easier ... I had a rocky start ... had my fair share of problems ... and now as we got 'steadier', I've new emerging problems ... my baby refuses to take anything from bottle but I need to go back to work. (i'm working on it now...anyone with any solutions? )

ps. going back to office, I'm going to 'advocate' for a breastfeeding / breast pumping room at each building via suggestion to HR. Well, of course I'll rope in the support of mums and mums-to-be (that included singles who have intention of having babies). I'll need all the support I can get. At least I hope many many more will get to benefit from this.