willing to learn

 This year I have learnt and am still learning to let go. For coriculum activities, I let my children choose the club / activity they are interested in and wanted to join. I believe this way they will be happy and I'll be happy too in the long run...because nothing compared with something learnt willingly and with passion.

One of the activity selected was chinese ink painting class, which gong gong have interest in and always wanted to learn. It's a skill and culture that's quite rare these days. Of course there were gu zhen class too (which I hope maybe they'll like but I can't be too greedy right).

2nd class and this is the outcome...I'm grateful for good effort she put in

Milk tea for mama

 My children made milk tea for me + themselves for mother's day celebration. It may not be comparable to commercial milk tea but it is best for me...with the ngam ngam sweetness. It is simple yet I'm grateful. 

Volunteer

 This year I'm going to sign up to be a volunteer. It could be to teach under privilege students or to serve under privileged community. Also it can be helping out during Wesak Day. I will ask around and explore ways how I can help to make a difference 1 action at a time. I vow to bring my children along to join serving the community.

Now that I have the urge, let's hit the iron while it's hot. Let's get started exploring what are the avenue / NGO I can join to contribute. Do share with me if you know of any charity looking for volunteers, thank you

choosing school for children

I believe every parents go through this ... choosing kindergarten, primary and secondary school for children. It's not easy and there are many factors to consider. And also because children will be spending almost half of their time in school. School is children 2nd home and children will bloom and groom if they meet good teachers and friends and get to learn and grow in good environment. 

Even after we made the decision, sometimes we may not get the school we want. Sometimes we need to go through alot in order to get into the school we wanted. And after that, sometimes we doubt if we made the right choice. Irony as it may seem but that seem to be the norm as parents. 

Let go

To hold, you must first open your hand. Let go

How true

I'm trying my level best to learn to let go. 

To learn that there's only that much a person can do. 

To learn that I'm a human with limitations.

To learn that I can't please everyone 

To learn that I have my own life to live and my own path to walk

and to learn not to care much about what others think

Hello 2023

The few seconds before 2023 were spent with my children welcoming a brand new year while trying to catch a few glimpse of the mini fireworks from our room window.

Earlier my daughter had made a video of new year wishes. We were still in holiday mode as I was on leave and we just came back from family trip. 2022 was with ups and downs and I'm thankful for every moment of it. Some days bringing me sweat and tears, some days bringing me heartwarming love from family and friends, somedays are so hard that I feel like giving up but looking back everything happen for some reasons (and act as reminders).

2023 ... we wish it is a better year for all of us, if it's a rough year, may God let me have the strength and wisdom to pull through. This is the year of change for me (change for better) and to live my life in the present the best way possible.

We are 13 days nearer to end of 2023...so I vowed to give my best for the remaining 352 days and be grateful for every day that I'm waking alive and breathing

last post for year 2022

Today is 31/12/2022 and last day of year 2022. It has been a year filled with ups and downs. It is also a year of 'wake up call' for me. Many things happened and some really make think thrice about what have I done so far..

is it really how I want to leave my life? 

Am I wasting my life away doing something I detest? 

Why can't I just for once live for myself? Life is short and I'm halfway already.

My children are growing up fast and I sort of regret not spending enough time with them. Seriously what's the use earning money trying to make a living when I couldn't be there for them when they need me most. Sad..

So come 2023, I'm finding my way out of the rut, going to do what is important to me, going to focus on my priorities (my children, my family, my life, my health). I'm just a normal human with my flaws and limitations. I'm with limited time and resources so I do not waste in on things that does not matter..I'm sorry but this can only be the way forward. And for once, i have this strong urge to venture into education industry educating our future generation.

And I'm starting my own youtube channel to share some info and raise public awareness. My motto for tomorrow : just do it (wrong or right never mind, as long as I get started and even if wrong, I take corrective action from there)

Last but not least, thank you 2022 for a wonderful year that gave me a wake up call on what are the important things in my life and making me realised that me and only me can make the change.

Crochet

I'm thankful my daughter is into crochet and knitting. It helps to mellow down her temper and allow her to learn to relax. And allow her to learn to put in effort to complete a 'project'

Some of her creations and hopefully next time she will have her own brand of crochet items and crafts :) 

making salted limes

Trying my luck at making some salted lime.. using calamansi lime. 

Keeping them to 'jaga pintu' in case of sore throat.

Salted lime makes good remedy for sore throat and for heatiness

Batch 1-4 combined for group pic

And another group pic

And the salt we used red for coarse and green for fine

 

1% improvement everyday

I do not know since when I start to believe that we can improve 1% everyday and by the end of 1 year..we would have improved by at least 365% (which is alot)

The 1% improvement could be from our personal life, children studies, work life, health, mental health, habits, productivity, self care, investment, learning and application.... it could almost be anything.

I try to brainwash my children to approach life using this concept too.. because like how Plato put it : Never discourage anyone who continually make progress, no matter how slow' 

So now instead of lamenting, I make effort to be thankful that me & my children are learning at least 1% everyday and grateful for having the opportunity to learn and grow.

8/9/2022 - my wake up call

8/9/2022 on this particular day, something happened to me. I consider it a wake up call to me. I literally almost work myself to near death. I'm not going to hide but it's something I'm bare to open to admit my self-negligence. 

Basically, I got so worried, so anxious, so panic about the amount of pressure and work that I broke down. I was crazy enough to let all the burden on myself. I was crazy enough not knowing to escalate and let go, thinking if I try on my level best, I may be able to settle it. However, this lesson definately give me a wake up call that I'm definately not capable of doing so. And why so stupid to burden my soul with those things that doesn't really even matter to me at all. 

So from that day till today, I'm learning and still learning to let go, to draw the line and to shout for help when I need it, to be brave to voice my view and have my rights exercised, to basically learn to love myself more cause the work without me is nothing, it will move on. But my family without me is a great deal and I don't want that to happen prematurely.

So to the person writing this.. You are ENOUGH. You have to LIVE for YOURSELF because this is YOUR LIFE. It's ok to FALL and FAIL, but STAND BACK UP and CONTINUE ON.

I'm really grateful to my those who helped me and saved my life in the time of need. Thank you for saving my life. I could be gone if not for your fast action. Thank you and may GOD bless you all. 

It feel good to declutter / give away / throw

Last Saturday, I managed to get rid of 4 boxes of recyclable items .. ie. cardboxes from packaging, old VCDs (if you still remember what they are:) recyclable plastic items, old clothes and some preloved books.

i have to say it feel so good to be able to clear the stuffs that have been sitting at my home for so long because they stop taking recycle stuffs from a few months back. Previously they use to collect recyclable items and garden compost every Thursday.

I feel that my burden are lifted ... perhaps the clutter has been a nagging need-to-do item at the back of my brain giving me invisible stress. I feel at last I managed to do something after promising dear for so long that I'll clear the clutters at home.

With this in mind, I'm looking forward to more clearing and decluttering sessions which actually helps to calm us down. My dream to make our home clutter free although I've been trying for so many years... but still I refused to give up and will even work harder towards my goals.  Till then...wish us luck :)

If you put in effort, God will help you

If you put in effort, God will help you..

This is what I always remind my daughter. She might be slower when it comes to learning academically but I wanted her to know that as long as she put in effort and hard work, God will always help her and path a road for her.

Today she got her chinese test .. she got 69/100 which help to build her confidence and trust that if she put in effort, she can improve. I'm thankful to her teachers who taught them relentlessly and for not giving up on my daughter.

Paradigm shift was what I needed and put to practice..i just have to believe that my daughter is capable. I just have to trust her ability and that she'll improve and be better. 

buying plants online

Rewind to maybe 3 years back, who would have thought that we can buy plants (real plants) online without having to go to the nursery? Last year I bought 2 kedondong (some call it amla) saplings online. Blame it on my craving to eat and drink amla sour plum juice..haha.

I went to the nursery near home however found that the kedondong sapling sold there was expensive. Basically I can buy 3 saplings online for the price of 1 from the nursery. So like it or not I'm willing to take the chance and after much survey, I ordered 2. Voila, they came in perfect condition ... protected and neat and currently the plants are thriving in my backyard .. just yet to bear fruits.

Sharing here how the plants were wrapped with so much care that I could literally feel how much effort the sender has put in to safely deliver the plants to me. And this business is doing a good job because it took opportunity of the pandemic to explore alternative of doing business and make lemonade out of lemons.

Thank you to the seller that made it possible for me to plant kedondong at reasonable price and for the effort to deliver value to customers.

my ABCD ... my family favourite drink

ABCD = Asam Aloe + Butterfly pea flower + Calamnansi Drink

Sometimes when we think hard enough or we have limited resources, it will bring out some suprises. Like this particular day, the weather was hot, we have plenty of aloe vera, butterfly pea flower and calamansi if not plucked and made useful, will dry and wilt away...so we came out with what we can think of ... the asam boi was a 'must' though which i purposely brought to bring the drink to another level. 

Just the wonder '4' 

Butterfly pea flower never fail to amaze me with it's eccentric blue / purple

Sour salty chewy ... all in a glass

Before we add water + ice

Getting comfort from out of comfort zone

This year, I decided to get a little more comfort from being out of my comfort zone. I'm reading 'chicken soup for life' - something which I love in chinese language (which is something out of my comfort zone)

I'm starting with 'a page a day keep the worry away'

I'm starting to love the chinese language...it's a beautiful language full of wisdom and a single character alone can have many meaningful interpretation.

I'm glad I stumbled upon these books @ Popular bookshop .. they are my new treasures.

doing what is best at the moment

 For the 1st time, she told me she wanted to go for art class. For the 1st time, she reminded me when i forgot to do research for art class. For the 1st time, she told me she wanted to join the real class right after the trial class. For the 1st time she treasured her drawing and creation so much. For the 1st time, she asked me if I have enrolled her for the art class and for the 1st time, she asked me if I have the money to pay for her art class.

Perhaps it's true that when it comes to things that we are passionate about, we have this internal motivation to get us moving towards our passion.

This is perhaps 1 of the best thing I could do at this moment..to give her support and guidance towards her strength and passion. Every child is god's gift from heaven... this I believe is true 

rediscover mindful activity

Last month we had a long weekend holiday, while others are doing local or overseas travel, we were travelling within our home back to our heart and mind. We started with a jigsaw which i brought online ..

We started our journey on Saturday, 1st day of the holiday

On the 2nd day of holiday, we almost reach our destination

Finally, on day 3 we reached our destination and decided to frame up this memory :)

why i like pandan leaves?

Pandan leaves is one of my favourite plant .. not only it gives a fresh green visual and aroma, it adds omph to our favourite foods...

                                        

Versatile & all-rounder pandan

Pandan rose.. the best air freshener for home

Pandan leaves can be kuih tako containers too =)

and last but not least, it just make kuih tako tastier

cool fun stuffs created

My youngest may not be good in her studies, however she has her way of creating new fun stuffs such as this writing / drawing board. Pardon her wrong spelling but I think this is cool