加油 my little one.. You can do it

My little one is still like a small child.

She still like things that are meant for babies / toddlers.

Perhaps it's because she didn't get to enjoy them when she was small and there weren't so many varieties during then.

So mama told her that she will get as present when she complete 50 books.. 加油 my little one

You can do it

small blessings

Our family is into avocado lately and avocado family is growing. These cuties are sleep companions every night.

I have been trying to advocate savings to my youngest but she doesn't seem to be able to grasp the concept of delay gratification. So when she showed me this article which she cut out from the newspaper on saving money and start saving her pocket money...no words can clearly describe what I felt. I'm really really thankful. And I learnt that some things is really can't be rushed.

Growing and improving every day

She is growing and improving each day albeit at her own pace. Today she shared with me a secret how she can remember what she learnt or need to remember. She said : do revision of the thing to remember before sleep. Then before you sleep after you off the light, you say the things that you want to remember out loud. You photostat (copy) the thing that you want to remember in your brain and you go through it again in your brain. You will remember it tomorrow when you wake up in the morning.

I'm grateful she found a way that can help her be better in her learning. I'm grateful that God showed her the way and showed me the way. Thank you

 

Do what we love in life

 Life is short. Why would we want to waste our time doing what we hate? Why am I getting all my priorities in life mixed up? Plan for myself & my family. Have backup plan and build multiple streams of income. Volunteer and do something I'm passionate about. Exercise and take care of mental wellness. Focus on building relationship with family and children. Practice self care because nothing is more important than this body who work so hard to keep us alive.

Milk tea for mama

 My children made milk tea for me + themselves for mother's day celebration. It may not be comparable to commercial milk tea but it is best for me...with the ngam ngam sweetness. It is simple yet I'm grateful. 

Let go

To hold, you must first open your hand. Let go

How true

I'm trying my level best to learn to let go. 

To learn that there's only that much a person can do. 

To learn that I'm a human with limitations.

To learn that I can't please everyone 

To learn that I have my own life to live and my own path to walk

and to learn not to care much about what others think

Hello 2023

The few seconds before 2023 were spent with my children welcoming a brand new year while trying to catch a few glimpse of the mini fireworks from our room window.

Earlier my daughter had made a video of new year wishes. We were still in holiday mode as I was on leave and we just came back from family trip. 2022 was with ups and downs and I'm thankful for every moment of it. Some days bringing me sweat and tears, some days bringing me heartwarming love from family and friends, somedays are so hard that I feel like giving up but looking back everything happen for some reasons (and act as reminders).

2023 ... we wish it is a better year for all of us, if it's a rough year, may God let me have the strength and wisdom to pull through. This is the year of change for me (change for better) and to live my life in the present the best way possible.

We are 13 days nearer to end of 2023...so I vowed to give my best for the remaining 352 days and be grateful for every day that I'm waking alive and breathing

last post for year 2022

Today is 31/12/2022 and last day of year 2022. It has been a year filled with ups and downs. It is also a year of 'wake up call' for me. Many things happened and some really make think thrice about what have I done so far..

is it really how I want to leave my life? 

Am I wasting my life away doing something I detest? 

Why can't I just for once live for myself? Life is short and I'm halfway already.

My children are growing up fast and I sort of regret not spending enough time with them. Seriously what's the use earning money trying to make a living when I couldn't be there for them when they need me most. Sad..

So come 2023, I'm finding my way out of the rut, going to do what is important to me, going to focus on my priorities (my children, my family, my life, my health). I'm just a normal human with my flaws and limitations. I'm with limited time and resources so I do not waste in on things that does not matter..I'm sorry but this can only be the way forward. And for once, i have this strong urge to venture into education industry educating our future generation.

And I'm starting my own youtube channel to share some info and raise public awareness. My motto for tomorrow : just do it (wrong or right never mind, as long as I get started and even if wrong, I take corrective action from there)

Last but not least, thank you 2022 for a wonderful year that gave me a wake up call on what are the important things in my life and making me realised that me and only me can make the change.

1% improvement everyday

I do not know since when I start to believe that we can improve 1% everyday and by the end of 1 year..we would have improved by at least 365% (which is alot)

The 1% improvement could be from our personal life, children studies, work life, health, mental health, habits, productivity, self care, investment, learning and application.... it could almost be anything.

I try to brainwash my children to approach life using this concept too.. because like how Plato put it : Never discourage anyone who continually make progress, no matter how slow' 

So now instead of lamenting, I make effort to be thankful that me & my children are learning at least 1% everyday and grateful for having the opportunity to learn and grow.

8/9/2022 - my wake up call

8/9/2022 on this particular day, something happened to me. I consider it a wake up call to me. I literally almost work myself to near death. I'm not going to hide but it's something I'm bare to open to admit my self-negligence. 

Basically, I got so worried, so anxious, so panic about the amount of pressure and work that I broke down. I was crazy enough to let all the burden on myself. I was crazy enough not knowing to escalate and let go, thinking if I try on my level best, I may be able to settle it. However, this lesson definately give me a wake up call that I'm definately not capable of doing so. And why so stupid to burden my soul with those things that doesn't really even matter to me at all. 

So from that day till today, I'm learning and still learning to let go, to draw the line and to shout for help when I need it, to be brave to voice my view and have my rights exercised, to basically learn to love myself more cause the work without me is nothing, it will move on. But my family without me is a great deal and I don't want that to happen prematurely.

So to the person writing this.. You are ENOUGH. You have to LIVE for YOURSELF because this is YOUR LIFE. It's ok to FALL and FAIL, but STAND BACK UP and CONTINUE ON.

I'm really grateful to my those who helped me and saved my life in the time of need. Thank you for saving my life. I could be gone if not for your fast action. Thank you and may GOD bless you all. 

It feel good to declutter / give away / throw

Last Saturday, I managed to get rid of 4 boxes of recyclable items .. ie. cardboxes from packaging, old VCDs (if you still remember what they are:) recyclable plastic items, old clothes and some preloved books.

i have to say it feel so good to be able to clear the stuffs that have been sitting at my home for so long because they stop taking recycle stuffs from a few months back. Previously they use to collect recyclable items and garden compost every Thursday.

I feel that my burden are lifted ... perhaps the clutter has been a nagging need-to-do item at the back of my brain giving me invisible stress. I feel at last I managed to do something after promising dear for so long that I'll clear the clutters at home.

With this in mind, I'm looking forward to more clearing and decluttering sessions which actually helps to calm us down. My dream to make our home clutter free although I've been trying for so many years... but still I refused to give up and will even work harder towards my goals.  Till then...wish us luck :)

If you put in effort, God will help you

If you put in effort, God will help you..

This is what I always remind my daughter. She might be slower when it comes to learning academically but I wanted her to know that as long as she put in effort and hard work, God will always help her and path a road for her.

Today she got her chinese test .. she got 69/100 which help to build her confidence and trust that if she put in effort, she can improve. I'm thankful to her teachers who taught them relentlessly and for not giving up on my daughter.

Paradigm shift was what I needed and put to practice..i just have to believe that my daughter is capable. I just have to trust her ability and that she'll improve and be better. 

doing what is best at the moment

 For the 1st time, she told me she wanted to go for art class. For the 1st time, she reminded me when i forgot to do research for art class. For the 1st time, she told me she wanted to join the real class right after the trial class. For the 1st time she treasured her drawing and creation so much. For the 1st time, she asked me if I have enrolled her for the art class and for the 1st time, she asked me if I have the money to pay for her art class.

Perhaps it's true that when it comes to things that we are passionate about, we have this internal motivation to get us moving towards our passion.

This is perhaps 1 of the best thing I could do at this moment..to give her support and guidance towards her strength and passion. Every child is god's gift from heaven... this I believe is true 

2021 Q1 is over...what's next?

 If there's 1 thing that Covid19 has taught us.. it would be 'don't take things for granted'. We may not know what happen tomorrow, next week, next month, next year...

So I've learnt that if there's something to be done, just do it now. Just get started by doing the smallest thing possible, be it just get up or just show up. Appreciate and be thankful for all that we have instead of focusing on what we lack.

Always reminding myself to treat others with kindness and see people in good light. All of us are going through tough times so if we can just do a little for others, why not? We are all trying our best each day. 

I learnt that I'm not good enough so I vow to improve each day. Just be a better me than yesterday. I've learnt to cut some slack for others and myself. Always believe that everyone always try to be the best they can be.

2021's Q1 is over, I'm glad I started doing some serious planning. Taking first step and little steps improving my personal & family life, health & financially. As they say, the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago, the 2nd best time is NOW. 

One eye monster easy breathe

For some time, I've been having nose block at night. Sometimes to the extent of affecting my slumber time. So to ease my breathing, he made me essential oil blend after doing some research. Thank you dear for the 'one-eye monster easy breathe' Now I can grin like it :D 

Impatient monster

 I've turned into an impatient monster ... 
one with the slogan of "faster...hurry up...quick quick quick" ...

I'm not sure what happened but I'm in a rush all day long. It feels like I don't have enough time to do everything.

But the worst part of it is that I rush everyone around me too. I rush my children to eat, to bath, to finish homework, to sleep until my children ask me one day : why are we always rushing mama? 

It created anxiety and when everyone is anxious, temper flare up easily (in my case).

As much as I would like to blame technology and the current culture of instant gratification we are all trapped in, I have myself to blame. I should have control over how I response to external stimuli. Why should I let them control me? 

Easier said than done (now, imagine your boss asking you something in whatsapp and expecting you to reply instantly...haha)

Now I understand how my children feel when I keep rushing them all the time.

Starting now, I'm going to take deep breathe each time I want to say the 'f**t word. and ask myself wth am I rushing?

Rainy season - the good and the not so good

 Rainy season started about 2 weeks ago. I do have a love-hate relationship with it..haha. 

Love it because it's easy to sprout n grow (basically we can just throw any seeds at the ground and it'll start growing). 

Hate it because my laundry never get dried (you know the moist and damp feel on your clothes and no crispy sunshine smell on clothes).

Love it because it's such a nice weather to sleep.

Hate it because it makes me miss my morning walk.

Love it because it reminds me that everything can be as changeable as weather.

Hate it because i start to miss sunshine and doses of vitamin D.