2011

2011 - how i fared (in no particular order)


I had become pregnant again while breastfeeding & before the recommended 2 years for mother with previous ceasarean scar.


I had done a VBAC.
I've put so much effort to try a VBAC that I think I can write a book on it.
* VBAC stands for Vaginal Birth After Ceaserean and it's a great deal for me


I had declined an offer at work giving myself so many lame justifications.


I've completed some 'sh*t' @ work namely PIDM (something about protecting the whole bank's deposit) which I didn't thought was possible. 


I've earned "bad daughter in law" award for defying my in-laws on the choice of my delivery & upbringing. 


I've had by far the worse kind of pain and glad that I pulled it through with lots of tears & sweat though. 


I've been torn & sewn back. "Once broken, considered 'sew'ed"  


I've got myself GDM 
*GDM stands for Gestational Diabetes Melitus


I've managed to stay sane despite has not been really travelling / holidaying for the past 2 years.


I've understood that we don't get to choose our parents ... for their shortcomings, we can only accept them, understand them & love them even more for who are we to judge them.


I've not visited my mom for 10 months despite missing her every single day. And being an unfilial daughter, I've even dare to ask whether mom can come to see me in my dreams or not. I must be crazy speaking to a moth or a white butterfly everytime I see one because I believe it is her.


I've managed to spend a large amount out of my 20 years savings to buy back what I've take for granted. I even got myself into a huge debt unwillingly and bigger repayment waiting for me come 2012.


I've learnt 'to be bad', learnt to 'fight' & to stand up for myself. 


I've managed to secure some very expensive 'retail theraphy' packages even though I knew I'm broke. 


I've learnt not to be ashamed to admit I didn't achieve what I wanted to because I didn't put in effort at all.... like cooking a descent meal, like recognizing route, like learning a new language, like exercising, like so many things I want to do but had not done.


I've learnt to not to be bothered by how others see me. In fact this I've been learning it diploma'lly previously but this year, I think I managed to bachelor degree'ed it.


I've became slacker in attempt to keep myself attractive & presentable(perhaps related to previous point). I stubbornly didn't even started using the masks my friends gave me from Taiwan last December 2010. 


I've up'ed my level of kiasu'ness and kiasi'ness. I have a need to protect those who are dependent on me. 


I've managed to get older and more very forgetful... CY witnessed this yesterday =p and let's hope I won't forget that I'm married *(to a good husband) with 2 kids.
* to note down before I forget.


I've managed to keep this blog going by putting in alot of rubbish. 


I've managed to get emotional openly without needing to hide and cry in shower (would like to cry in the rain but I'm afraid of falling sick). 
I've also managed to shed accumulated 1 kg of tears this year.


I've managed to grow sideway but I hope I can donate blood in future.

baby cube toy : attempt 2

Happy with attempt 2, will try with more scrap clothes variety =) 
Those I earlier intended to make for ah bi have been given to my colleagues' babies. Although it's something simple ... hope the babies like it =) 
For ah bi need not worry, mama can always make some more =) 

I've

Secret garden (K)
Love in disguise (M)

Overheard (C)
Accident (C)

Detective Dee (C)

Shaolin (C)

Sun yung Kwan scandal (K)

Nasi lemak 2.0 (M)

Bad teacher (E)

Coffee house (K)

Drive of life (C)
Ghostwriter (C)
Crossing Hennessy (C)

Fated to love you (M) : currently watching 


(K) : Korean
(C) : Cantonese
(M) : Mandarin


I've enjoyed watching all and learnt some life lessons too =) 
Actually don't know this can consider as achievement or not, this is the 1st time watching so many series / movies in about 2 months' time =p 

career & family

Just the day before, I 'chickened out' from a bigger role career wise. 
That is after I wasted a few days of my maternity leave thinking and rethinking over and over over it.
Oh...and I pretty much gave myself a few too many 'lame' justifications for 'chickening out' 
and I totally understand the implications of my action 'chickening out'
Among the lame excuses, the timing is out...I've just take on a bigger role personal wise and come clashing with it is a bigger role career wise.
Strange though...I still felt relieved. 
Perhaps I don't have the 'fire' in me anymore, it's slowly distinguishing.


Why can't I choose both and balance them out? 
Just like how I can't multitask ... I couldn't focus on one without sacrificing another. 
There's this thing that I haven't learn to tackle.
From past experiences, I usually end up neither here nor there. Worse come to worse, I flopped both.


Yes, I'm aware that nothing comes easily without sacrifice...
which is perhaps why I choose to sacrifice for those things that are to me, more important.


sorry for the lame post ...
Wishing everyone a merry merry christmas & a happy happy new year =)

回家真好

heard this song 回家真好 on 98.8 radio yesterday ... the lyrics sort of convey my thoughts.

电话不停在吵老板不停在闹

总逃不开工作表做完了又来了
怎样也甩不掉
回家感觉真好别管世俗纷扰
把一整天的面罩忙和累的大脑
都往热水里泡
让没一颗细胞忘掉烦恼
我的家就是我的城堡
每一砖一瓦用爱创造
家里人的微笑是我的财宝
等回家才知道自己真的重要
双手能为家人而粗糙
班么荣耀那么骄傲
你为我把饭烧我为你打扫
啊回家的感觉实在真的太好

Precious : antenatal class

If you still remember my earlier post on wth I've got more important things to do ,
here's the more important thing that I'm referring to.


In my attempt for VBAC (Vaginal Birth After Ceasarean), I've look high & low to attend any classes that will increase my chances.
When I finally found out about the antenatal class HUKM is offering, the 24/9/11 class is full and even on the waiting list, I was told even the waiting list is full.


I've got no choice but to enrol for the next class on 22/10/11. They have only 1 class per month. The overwhelming response for the september class was because being the 'puasa' month, August has no class. I even went to the extend of asking my baby to wait, give mama chance to attend antenatal class. 
True enough, my little one allow me the chance for she came 8 days after I attended the class.


Never mind the fact that we had to fork out RM100 per couple, I have to pre-book my very busy ah dear. The class starts from 8.30am to 5.30pm.


We were a little sceptical as the previous antenatal class we attended during 1st child were more like a series of compact marketing advertising series put together. So we went to this with open mind.


The day came and we went, during registration we were asked if we are 1st time parents,      I told them no but I forgot (just answer for answering sake).


Upon seeing my tummy,
Nurse : ni dah macam nak bersalin ni, bila due? 
me : awal november kak
Nurse : tapi ni dah turun ni ... nanti bila buat senaman, u tengok je la, takut nanti you bersalin hari kat sini pulak.
me : tak pe kak, boleh buat lagi, tak takut. Lagi nak belajar.
Nurse : tapi memang you punya nampak macam dah nak bersalin bila bila masa.


These are the topics covered
1. Normal & abnormal birth
2. Jagaan selepas bersalin and perancangan keluarga
3. Pain relief in labour
4. Optimal nourishment during pregnancy
5. cord blood
6. Penjagaan bayi & permohonan sijil kelahiran
7. penyusuan ibu
8. Senaman antenatal, breathing exercise & postnatal
9. tour of labour room & ward.


Overall, I find this antenatal class good and informative. 
I like activity 8 and 9 the best. However, I almost totally forgotten how to breath during labour. I also like the touring part because it allow us to know where we will be giving birth rather than suprise.


In attending to this, I've missed another FOC antenatal organise by nurses @ KKIA (Klinik Kesihatan Ibu & Anak). It was so co-incidentally on the same day and the nurses very much wanted me to join. Yes, I've grown very close to them for they are the ones that took care of me during this pregnancy and even visited us numerous time @ home postnatal. I feel guilty for letting them down since they very sincerely organised the antenatal class and come back to work on Saturday for the sake of us mothers.

wardrobe winter cleaning

Now is and isn't the right time to do wardrobe winter cleaning ...

IS because when else can I find the time to do if not now?

ISN'T because when your body has ballooned to its new size, you tend to find alot of pre-loved clothes to be given away. And it's not easy looking at the clothes and wondering whether you still can fit in a couple of months down the road. So I took the easy way out, anything that I can't wear now...I'm not going to be able to wear later. Fullstop.

anyway, I'm glad I've successfully completed my mission impossible =p

the last round I did this was during my maternity leave too =p

I guess I only have the courage to do it only at times like these...haha

王力宏「你不知道的事」《戀愛通告》

Just watched this movie 戀愛通告 'Love in Disguise' yesterday and I fall in love immediately with the theme song and Li Hom (for him for composing such a beautiful song, also for his character in the movie).

Nowadays that I've got the chance to watch back some 'some time back movies' ... I realised I missed alot of good movies... what a shame.

Easily put, I've been leading a 'entertainmentless' life ... that makes me such a boring person. People will be talking about the latest movie and I know 'ZERO'

Enough of blabber ... enjoy!

baby cube toy : attempt 1

armed with most basic sewing accessories : needle & thread, scissors, cloth and measurement tape and LOTS of LOVE, I managed to sew something up while ah bi is sleeping.

Can you spot the mistake?

ps. anyone any idea what else can I use as the filing beside cotton?

pre-loved

don't we just love hand me downs (read : pre-loved)?

for :

(a) mama & papa get to save alot (and I'm guilty of buying 2 set of new clothes only for ah bi so far ... that also due to part of chinese belief)

(b) both ah bi gets lots of varieties in their clothing (something that compensate this mama lack of fashion sense..haha)

(c) good for the environment ... reuse, recycle

(d) feel good & strengthen relationship ... you give some 'love' and you receive some 'love' ... that's what makes the world go round.

ps. I'm not sure but my babysitter told me that children should wear pre-loved clothes so that they will 快高长大 ... I love this concept. Whoever that came out with this concept is BRILLIANT!

Haha... I intend to introduce this concept as well ... adult can wear pre-loved clothes for 合家平安.

outlast

Have you ever thought of how does it feel repaying other people debt with your own hard earned money...money which you initially have better plans and better use like for your children?

have you ever thought of how does it feel to pay off debt for someone else where you get nothing in return....meaning you don't get to own a house / car eventually, it's not even for education, it's not even for some retail purchases / not even holiday and tour.

have you ever thought of how does it feel when you have to scrimp, dare not use money yourself, sacrifice your savings, sacrifice your dreams because you have no choice but to repay someone else debt?

have you ever thought of how difficult it is for us to / how much hardship we have to endure/ how much we have to sacrifice to pay off the debt?

I hope I have enough strength to outlast the muddle I've been thrown into...

I'm very very tired of carrying this sack... when can i put it down? or at least is there anyone that can help me carry the sack together?

Precious : coconut water

with this, I'll start my sporadical periodical flashback on my 怀孕 旅程.

I couldn't tell you more how I'm obsessed with young coconut water even before I reaches 3rd trimester of pregnancy ... for it was the only luxury, the only indulgence I could afford (thanks to gestational diabetes I had).

I could go on a 'coconut water spree' and 'coconut hunt' without being questioned..haha

I discovered that coconut water is like chocolate, people (read: I) can get addicted.

As a proof of how bad was my addiction was :

On the late afternoon of the day I gave birth, with contraction of 5 minutes apart (painful contractions mind you), I still have the 'mood/energy/motivation/whatever it takes' to go Tesco to get those 'tender young coconut' selling at RM2.09 / RM2.19 each.

The price differences you noticed? It was price of the precious commodities 'coconut' @ Tesco at different days / weeks. Yes, I'm that obsessed that I stalk the 'coconut fella' and survey almost all stores selling coconut within 5 km in my neighborhood.

Looking back,I didn't know how the hell did I manage to limp around with painful contractions and back pain in Tesco, stopping every 5 minutes (pretending to see things when bitting teeth to tahan pain) just to buy 3 biji of coconuts that I didn't even get to consume....because I 'pushed' that particular night.

lol...such is the power of the 'COCONUT'

椰子 万岁 万岁 万万岁

Sung Kyung Kwan scandal

I've just finally finished watching this Korean series despite my colleague persuasion since earlier of 2011 ... love it. Thank you Kar Mun =)

and the actress is so so sweetly beautiful, I would have fallen for her too ... =p

highly recommended =)

while BF'ing ...

Still remember those picture dictionary we use to have during lower primary school... with those beautiful and colourful pictures.

I got it for RM1.29 (RM12.90 less 90%) with the intention of teaching my kids.

The dictionary published by Longman claimed to cover at least more than 1000 items.

Never did I know I need it more .. for the past 1 week or so, I've been diligently learning item by item while breastfeeding my little one.

Humbly, I underestimated the usefulness of this dictionary, there are still many things I ought to know and learn.

Guess, I found a better way to spend my time while breastfeeding ...

other than falling asleep together with baby

or watching drama (always got not enough time to even on the tv).

At least, by the end of the dictionary, my chinese vocabulary is better by 1000+ items =D hehe

1 iPod for 1 kid

Remember those olden day practice where wife get rewarded for giving birth?

Oh, I've just got mine... An Ipod =D

Very thoughtful of ah dear to have got me something that I like & will use for a long long time.

Features I like ....the music, the radio station( especially during commuting), the pedometer function( now I don't have to manually count steps n miss counts), the watch function( since my watch rosak long ago).

Didn't know he was serious when he said he'll get me something from Singapore when he was there for work during my confinement.

As usual, the mischevious fella gave me a 'tong of biscuit from Singapore' to test my reaction...haha

Thank you so much ah dear =) I love you (haha, not only because u give me iPod as present but so many things else)

It was totally unexpected but a very touching gesture though.

The 'push' season

Siew choo : 13 oct 2011

Jasslyn : 26 oct 2011

Choon hui's wife : 26 oct 2011

Myself : 30 oct 2011

Siew chui : 22 nov 2011

Juliet : 23 nov 2011

Within a period of a month plus, there are 6 of us labouring hard to bring our precious babies to this world.

No wonder they say towards the last quarter of the year is the 'hot' months where hospital maternity ward will be full, confinement aides fully booked, full moon related services having good business.

Looking at the rate & trend this is going, we will have more dragon babies next year.

To all mothers, no matter what people say, no matter how tough it was or will be... Just want to let you know you're doing great :)

Ps. Aside to my colleague Bonnie & yee leng, I just found out that we have a strange coincidence here.... Yee leng gave birth on 2/8/11 just 1 day before you(bonnie) come back to work on 3/8/11. And I gave birth on. 30/10/11 just 1 day before yee leng come back to work on 31/10/11.