angry?

At times when I'm angry at someone especially my loved ones ...

I have this thought that comes to mind

" .... when else can I love this person more if not now?

How can I be angry with someone who has loved me and beared with me all these while even when I'm at my worst?

What if god decided to take this person away forever while I'm too busy being angry?

How can I be angry and yet love this person so much?

What if I've only got these much of time (years / months / days) with this person I love and I spent it by being angry with the person? .... how much time would I have wasted then? ..... "

most of the time, by the time I finished thinking ....

I would have had my heart soften (yah I know me like a crab, hard on the outside, soft on the inside) and cooled down. Anger vanished into thin air.

At times, I even feel a strong urge to love the person more instead. Vowing not to hurt this person I love.

I don't know since when I started having thoughts like this.

But I think it has helped me alot because I seldom find myself being angry these days.

I've forgotten whether I'm a hot-tempered person (but my sis insisted that I'm a very fierce person last time). Now I think I've managed to keep some of those temper in the freezer at home.

ps. why you are reading this post? Ask this colleagues of mine why she asked me question like "why you never seem to be angry before one?" She on the other hand, is easily angered by little irritations.

(maybe the fact is she's not around when I'm angry =p LOL)

pic from www.corbis.com